Post by Trev Williams on Apr 1, 2007 15:52:26 GMT -1
While standing in a crowded pub at a friends birthday party I started thinking properly for the first time in ages, I thought it might be useful to share what I thought..
“Everybody I know I like. Don’t dislike anyone, why do some people not like me?” linking in with self esteem I think a healthy balance is to allow yourself not to like some people.. and therefore let some people not like you. I thought of an example, Eastenders (which I am a bit of an addict!), I tried to think of someone I didn’t like in it.. but couldn’t, all the people who are playing bad/evil characters I would watch thinking it was great acting and therefore I could like the character. This also led me to believe I might be closer to enemies than friends! I have often found the ‘triggers’ that cause me to get ill are the people I strive to get in contact with and ‘resolve’, therefore they would like me.
“I always reply to people at once, why do some people not?” this also links for me in with religion, treat you’re neighbour as yourself, although the reverse doesn’t work.. if you expect something it will often not happen and therefore make you depressed.. if you expect nothing anything that happens will be a positive. I also related back to text messaging, and relationships.. “Reply straight away : keen, leave it a bit : thought about it, no reply : they hate me” all rational though (e.g. They might be busy, they may have lost their phone, they may not know how to say no to the question) left me. This also explained why I might write many messages to get a few back. That way hopefully softening the rejection of one or two.
The idea of “one perfect person” which I believe now to be badly forced upon us by the media, is somewhat corrupt, and instead of finding a partner you can trust, one in many, someone might constantly reject all the positive people around them because they are looking for a “perfect match”, which is impossible. I also thought about self perfection, and how this might link to arrogance, or seemingly arrogance, when actually it shows great insecurity about not being perfect. I found that when I was confident on my own, I was popular, yet when I was feeling ill and therefore clingy to a crowd, I was unpopular. Although I guess popularity can’t be judged that easily, but it appeared that way.
“How can I concentrate better with so much noise?” I asked myself, but having so much going round in my head already meant the situation which would normally distract someone actually made it easier to think. I’d also say that people with mental health problems might well be better in a crisis (by that I mean a physical crisis rather than a mental crisis). I remember my friend broke his arm, but coped amazingly, where I thought it might tip him over the edge. I find it amazing how people deal things after they fall ill, as they say what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.
Trev Williams
“Everybody I know I like. Don’t dislike anyone, why do some people not like me?” linking in with self esteem I think a healthy balance is to allow yourself not to like some people.. and therefore let some people not like you. I thought of an example, Eastenders (which I am a bit of an addict!), I tried to think of someone I didn’t like in it.. but couldn’t, all the people who are playing bad/evil characters I would watch thinking it was great acting and therefore I could like the character. This also led me to believe I might be closer to enemies than friends! I have often found the ‘triggers’ that cause me to get ill are the people I strive to get in contact with and ‘resolve’, therefore they would like me.
“I always reply to people at once, why do some people not?” this also links for me in with religion, treat you’re neighbour as yourself, although the reverse doesn’t work.. if you expect something it will often not happen and therefore make you depressed.. if you expect nothing anything that happens will be a positive. I also related back to text messaging, and relationships.. “Reply straight away : keen, leave it a bit : thought about it, no reply : they hate me” all rational though (e.g. They might be busy, they may have lost their phone, they may not know how to say no to the question) left me. This also explained why I might write many messages to get a few back. That way hopefully softening the rejection of one or two.
The idea of “one perfect person” which I believe now to be badly forced upon us by the media, is somewhat corrupt, and instead of finding a partner you can trust, one in many, someone might constantly reject all the positive people around them because they are looking for a “perfect match”, which is impossible. I also thought about self perfection, and how this might link to arrogance, or seemingly arrogance, when actually it shows great insecurity about not being perfect. I found that when I was confident on my own, I was popular, yet when I was feeling ill and therefore clingy to a crowd, I was unpopular. Although I guess popularity can’t be judged that easily, but it appeared that way.
“How can I concentrate better with so much noise?” I asked myself, but having so much going round in my head already meant the situation which would normally distract someone actually made it easier to think. I’d also say that people with mental health problems might well be better in a crisis (by that I mean a physical crisis rather than a mental crisis). I remember my friend broke his arm, but coped amazingly, where I thought it might tip him over the edge. I find it amazing how people deal things after they fall ill, as they say what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.
Trev Williams